I can guess what you are thinking. Where have you been bitch? And why have you tormented us with two lame-ass posts in a row? I know, I know. This one will be less lame, I promise. And I do have an excuse: I was writing Chapter One of my Feminist Figure Girl book, sending it this morning to the amazing members of my writing group so that we can discuss it later this week. I have already warned those brainiac gals that the dinner menu will consist of my diet food, namely bison steak, roasted sweet potatoes, and asparagus. Well, they can also enjoy wine, appetizers, dessert, and bread, while I resentfully sip on lemon water. Can’t wait!

Actually I won’t be at all resentful because my clean eating is already having visible results, and flattering rewards. Two women in the change room at the gym asked me if I was competing this year, and one of them said I looked ‘jacked.’ Oh how I loved that, and soon it might even be true. I had a great week, with a contemporary art show I curated receiving national media exposure, and my second book manuscript accepted for publication by the University of Toronto Press. I was just looking at the reader’s reports—critiques written by experts in the field—and one advised me to be ‘less boastful.’ Hardee har har. Not bloody likely. Especially not if I’m talking about my guns. This blog promises to award a prize, and I think you are going to like what I have in mind: ‘Two tickets to the gun show.’

What makes Anchor Man’s guns so funny is that they are not impressive; nor is his weight lifting technique particularly admirable. Good ‘stache though.

What will I vote on in order to win this fabulous prize? It’s like I can read your mind. Here is where this post starts to improve: you can respond to the initial designs made for the Feminist Figure Girl logo by my fabulous man designer. This logo will appear on t-shirts, tank tops, business cards, and most likely, also in ink permanently etched into my back, upper arm, or perhaps as a colourful vagazzle. You can vote on that later. I need a code name for this designer, which I can then shorten to initials (as is my wont), but first I will get to know him better. So far he is young, stylish, creative, fun, energetic, professional, and adorable. I’m sure he is other things too. Please take a close look at his designs, thinking about how they will look on your FFG swag, especially clothing and coffee mugs, and choosing your favourite. Whoever sends me the best comment explaining his or her choice will win a free swag package, along with an autographed picture of my guns. Here goes…

Please note that the image number is located at the TOP of each scan.

Design Number One

Design Number Two

Design Number Three

Design Number Four

Design Number Five