The Rise of the Pedometer: by Kick and Glide

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pedometer number twoGoing for a walk?  Count your steps. Going for a coffee? There’s an app to capture caffeine intake. We can monitor our personal activity as never before. The clever wags are calling it “the biometric selfie”. Whatever you call the phenomenon it is clear, we have an itch to count and measure what we accomplish and how we live. Continue reading

Beware of “Crisis Pregnancy Centres”

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Caravaggio, The Incredulity of Saint Thomas, 1602-1602

Caravaggio, The Incredulity of Saint Thomas, 1602-1602

Yesterday I received an e-mail from some antiabortion guy, asking me to have an expose of so-called “crisis pregnancy centres” removed from the internet. How flattering that he identified me as an all-powerful pro-choice goddess. Continue reading

Blurred Lines: I Don’t Want It (Guest Post with Sexual Assault Trigger Warning)

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tulle-bateau-neckline-ball-gown-wedding-dress-with-cap-sleevesThere were no secret reservations. So many lovely people attended the wedding of my best friend and her beloved. I met a great guy. I spent time with old friends. I made new friends like Dave and Sally. They had been married for seven years. Dave and Sally seemed quiet, somewhat reserved at first and then this gradually transitioned into more relaxed, banter-filled interactions. I usually judge comfort with people based on the amount of shared stories or tagline-jokes. I was a fan of Dave’s because he seemed funny; Sally’s because she said the wrong things at the worst times—and she wore the cutest dress to the wedding!

Imagine my shock when later in the evening I found Dave’s hand on my ass. Continue reading

My Life in Lists

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Updated but badly lit progress report. I am down ten pounds since my last report. I felt great training today; back to my old self.

Updated but badly lit progress report. I am down ten pounds since my last report. I felt great training today; back to my old self.

You might already know that I am a habitual and possibly obsessive list maker. I have at least three lists in my purse at any one time, as well as a master agenda for the month on my desk at home. I like to write these lists by hand as an aid to memory, but many remain in my head, constantly shuffled and reshuffled: Who is due for a dinner invitation? What provisions are currently in my kitchen? What books should I read next? What are the top five best moments of my life? Etc. Continue reading

One Year After My Figure Show: Guest Post by PDDs

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PDDs backstage during her Figure competition in June 2012.

PDDs backstage during her Figure competition in June 2013.

At this time last year I was working towards my goal of competing in the Figure category of the 2013 ABBA Bodybuilding show. The past 11 months have been filled with many ups and downs as well as some nearly epic fails. Yet somehow, I’ve managed to succeed!

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Motherhood is Bad for Your Health: A Dialogue Between FFG and Hissy Fit

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FFG poses in a lame ass way on May 16. This is my "before" photo, as I am ready to get serious about getting back into shape.

FFG poses in a lame ass way on May 16. This is my “before” photo, taken nearly 4 months after my caesarean operation. Watch for monthly update pics as I get back into shape.

Feminist Figure Girl: Well Hissy Fit, complaining about motherhood is absolutely forbidden, especially to those who have healthy, happy infants. So are you ready to break a social taboo and piss off a lot of people?

Hissy Fit: Bring it.

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ASK A TRAINER # 24: “Can I Lose Fat during a 20 Minute Workout?”

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zzzzzzzz lift and bitch 033Ask a Trainer Question of the month!

Hey D! I just read your last post on Lianne’s blog about belly fat. Now there is an issue that is near and dear to my heart. I had an idea for another topic, although I’m sure you already have thousands; it is something I’ve always wanted to know: “Do you need to exercise for more than 30 minutes at a time to burn fat?” There are so many different time saving exercise programs out there now, like Tabata, 20 minute interval training etc. As a busy mom, I’m intrigued by this concept of the shorter workout, but am not sure that it would actually burn fat.

Thanks D,
Vanessa

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Priorities

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It is very important that I roast organic chickens on a regular basis.
It is imperative that I roast organic chickens on a regular basis.

Everyone told me that having a baby would change my priorities. That turned out to be somewhat true. Yes, my son is of primary concern, but he has shuffled rather than replaced other interests. Now that my time is tighter than ever—I have always multi-tasked and had too much to do—I have begun noticing which activities remain important in my life, and which ones have been discarded with the excuse that I am “too busy.” You will not be surprised to learn that fitness remains near the top of my list. Yet I was surprised by some of my choices. Below is an accurate list of things that are important to me, and things that no longer make the grade. This confession is based on my actions rather than on any idealized vision of myself. After all, I think that hopes and dreams count for shit. You are what you do and have done, not what you say you are or what you plan to do in the future.

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Getting Back into Shape

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It's all my fault.

It’s all my fault.

It’s hard not to get upset when you start back at the gym after a prolonged period away. I was off for two full months while recovering from a caesarean section, forbidden by my doctor from lifting anything over ten pounds. I was inclined to follow his advice after reading online descriptions of post-partum women who had ripped their stomachs open by training too soon after surgery. Although I had worked out seriously until I was 8 months pregnant, and then in a somewhat lame-ass way until two days before giving birth, I was shocked by how quickly my fitness level declined. Previously I had done shitloads of full chin-ups, but now I am back on the assisted pull-up machine, managing five sets of five slowly with 50 pounds of weight counterbalancing me. And as for full push-ups? Forget it. I have returned to my knees. How the mighty have fallen. It is truly humiliating.

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My Eating Disorder: Post by Deanna Harder, aka Fitbabe

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Deanna Harder looking gorgeous during her last Figure competition. Photo and caption by FFG.

Deanna Harder looking gorgeous during her last Figure competition. Photo and caption by FFG.

MY STORY

Just eat.

How hard is that? Food is fuel silly.

If it were only that easy. I hate being hungry. I really hate being full. I am afraid of food. But food is fuel, right?

 When people are afraid of food they have strange eating patterns. We will decide, for example, that there are six foods that are safe. At least, that is what I did. Continue reading

Five Unsolicited Comments Made to a Pregnant Lady

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I'm walking as fast as I can!

I’m walking as fast as I can!

Pregnancy has not changed my life that much, so far. It has, however, attracted more than a few remarks from both acquaintances and strangers. My increasingly evident belly—I am scheduled to give birth by induction in only a few days—leads people to believe that they know something about me and my future. While I vowed not to blog too much about my “ladylike” pregnancy (i.e. it is conformist in a way that reminds me of Edwardian pantaloons), I have a few funny incidents that I cannot resist sharing with you. Continue reading

Guest Post: Male Entitlement and the Pregnant Female Body

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Figure 1 Travelling Alone While Pregant Invites All Kinds of Unwanted Attention [http://www.tallinn-airport.ee/upload/Editor/Reisijale/ lapseootel_reisija.jpg]

Figure 1 Travelling Alone While Pregant Invites All Kinds of Unwanted Attention [http://www.tallinn-airport.ee/upload/Editor/Reisijale/
lapseootel_reisija.jpg]

By Hissy Fit

After attending two conferences in as many weeks, I have learned that strangers, especially white men, feel entitled to make unsolicited comments about women’s pregnant bodies.

These men can be from all walks of life – hotel staff, airplane travelers, and conference acquaintances.  Yet no matter their position, when they see a pregnant woman working or traveling alone, their response is to (a) notice the woman’s belly; (b) make a remark about it; and (c) engage in unwelcome behaviour. Continue reading

How Doing a Figure Show Changed My Life, Slightly

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Overall view of the x theatre during figure medium group (with Fitbabe).

Overall view of the Maclab Theatre in downtown Edmonton, with the Figure Medium class on stage (Fitbabe is at the back, second from the left). All photos courtesy of FFG’s crappy camera.

On Saturday June 01, I finished up my cardio and headed over to the Northern Alberta Bodybuilding Championships to watch PDDs and Fitbabe compete in Figure. Continue reading

The Tanned and Butt Ugly: Photos I Cannot Resist Showing You

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This gallery contains 32 photos.

After finishing my book, which is now in the hands of external referees, I realized that many photographs—taken by the incomparable artist and designer Patrick J. Reed—could not be included in it. I think his images offer feminist interventions in the often heteronormative, … Continue reading